Shifting Perspectives

By Stacy Kamala Waltman

Here is another opportunity to be reminded of how different situations in our lives appear depending upon where we are in relationship to the circumstances.

At work, the CFO’s tasks include minimizing expenditures, the Marketing Director job entails maximizing exposure and impact of the company’s brand and the Human Resource Director’s task includes handling the emotional and legal climate of the company.

How well these individuals relate to one another and their respective roles in the company will have significant impact on the overall success of the organization.

How do you manage the appearance of a different point of view?

How do you navigate the emotional waters of conflict in new ways?

Will you benefit from learning a new skill set so that you can expand your current capacity to relate and converse?

The ability to broaden your perspectives will enhance every area of your life. Please take a look at this clip and remember what you already know.

http://micro.magnet.fsu.edu/primer/java/scienceopticsu/powersof10/index.html

I can help you learn a new set of tools to expand your perspective, conversational skills and relate to others in ways that will increase your success at work and at home.

To your success!

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Leadership ~ To Serve

 

By Stacy K. Waltman

“The ability to perceive or think differently is more important than the knowledge gained.” – David Bohm (http://twm.co.nz/Bohm.html )

What is leadership and what makes a good leader?

As with many of our perceptions, the definition of leadership has been evolving with our understanding of the world and each individual’s place in it. 

We have historically thought of leadership as a quality that exists in certain people and not others.  In the past, the idea of someone in a leadership position has been one with a great deal of authority, power and independence. 

When we have this mind-set and search for this fixed type of person, we don’t really see each other.  Instead of seeing what is in front of us, we see stored-up images, interpretations, feelings, doubts, distrusts, likes and dislikes that the other person evokes in us. We’re locked into a frame of reference that can keep us from perceiving things outside of our basic assumptions. 

In this fixed state, people learn to don masks and play pre-determined roles void of authenticity.  Evolution from this place is limited.

In Daniel H. Pink’s book, A Whole New Mind, he discusses how our society is moving away from the Information Age into the Conceptual Age where leadership is marrying our left-directed reasoning ability with our right-directed aptitudes like design, story, symphony, empathy, play and meaning. 

Story, myth, allegory, empathy and relationship are the qualities that a machine cannot replicate. In this way, we are differentiated from our computer counterparts. 

Our future depends on our interdependence on the whole of being human instead of fragmented and compartmentalized parts as in the previous way we interacted in the business environment.   

For years Joseph Campbell wrote about The Power of Myth and related truths.

“Myth is the secret opening through which the inexhaustible energies of the cosmos pour into human manifestation.”
– Joseph Campbell (http://www.mythsdreamssymbols.com/herojourney.html )

Our emerging definition of leadership includes believing there is a different or better way to do things than they have been done before.

It’s not a pose of arrogance but rather a viewpoint with an infinite amount of possibilities.

This vision of Leadership is that everyone has leadership capacity which simply needs to be called forth from the collective knowledge base.

“Leadership is about empathy. It is about having the ability to relate and to connect with people for the purpose of inspiring and empowering their lives,” says Oprah Winfrey. 

According to Joseph Jaworski in “Synchronicity – The inner path of leadership”, today’s effective leader has an attitude of servitude.

The leader who has the wisdom to ask, “How can I serve you?” is based upon a greater understanding of how we are all connected in a larger cosmic body.

When one of us is in trouble, we are all suffering. When we view how our actions affect the world, we are operating out of the understanding that we are all links in the same chain. 

Leadership is also the ability to be transparent by taking off the masks which were worn in an archaic time by those who were afraid of many things, including change.

The willingness to take risks and embracing failure as a tool for growth and refinement is a valuable asset in today’s leader. “Where you stumble, there your treasure lies,” says Joseph Campbell. 

Ultimately the qualities of a true and effective leader has more to do with their state of “being” than with their state of “doing”.

This state has an effortless quality to it that is steeped in trusting a higher power and allowing the synchronicities of our lives to unfold without effort. 

The ability to listen and allow people to feel heard is another benchmark of a authentic leader. They engender trust and show respect by holding confidences close to heart. 

Today’s leader is adept at merging their heart and its wisdom with their rational mind and its knowledge.  Leadership in this emerging dynamic has a lot to do with integrating your whole being into the Leadership role.

We are in a time of integration where the individual is learning to merge the various areas of their lives that have been previously compartmentalized.  New skills are being learned and practiced.  The way is not always clear ~ until it is.

The individual leader is taking their personal integration into the business environment and businesses are taking this wisdom into the global economy. 

Leadership is a state of being whole and integrated in an ever-evolving refinement that occurs throughout our entire lives.

As within – so it is without. 

The limits to our individual potential and the potential of business environments as well as our world are mostly imagined.

Go beyond what you think is possible.  Find the miraculous in your day – operate in the realm of possibilities.  Live your life with a whole new mind.

 

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September 11, 1906

 

By Stacy K. Waltman

It too happened on September 11th ~ one hundred years ago. 

Please visit www.workadayforpeace.org for an historical recounting of Mahatma Gandhi’s approach to ending discrimination through his non-violent protestations. 

Gandhi changed the nation and the world through his strong and peaceful efforts. 

Please take a moment to read the article on Gandhi and perhaps gain a new perspective on the significance of that particular day.

May you be blessed with kindness, wisdom and strength.

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Working Relationships

By Stacy K. Waltman

Relationships are found in every area of our lives. Even when we don’t realize we’re having a relationship, one is being experienced.

We have relationships with our boss, co-workers, significant other, siblings, parents, committee members, church, and more. Some people say that we even have a relationship with our money, health and food.

Managing relationships well can be the difference between a company’s making a profit or posting a loss and a person’s ability to weather personal storm’s at home. It can also be the difference between having a healthy respect for money and food and having an unhealthy obsession with both.

I returned from a coaching workshop in Rhode Island a few months ago on the power of relationships. It was titled, “Organization and Relationship Systems Coaching”. In this class we developed our skills for successfully helping people interact with their various relationship dynamics.

One of the most interesting concepts I heard this week was, “In order to get to a healthier and more productive place, we need to give up our fear of conflict, turmoil and resistance.” ~ John M. Gottman

Even as I write that, my hand wavers a little. The idea behind this audacious statement is that where there is conflict there is a desire and opportunity to reach a greater understanding between people in business and at home. That’s not how we usually view interactions that tear at our current social fabric.

Sam Keen wrote, “Sometimes what looks like a fight is only the fierceness of love.” What a difference of viewpoint. You can imagine how differently you might react depending on how you view confrontation. What else do we miss when we push the auto-pilot relationship button?

In the workplace and at home, the three greatest saboteurs of strong, and healthy relationship dynamics are 1) the habit of blaming; 2) the habit of keeping secrets; and 3) lying.

Each of these tendencies keeps people separate from one another and never allows for a greater understanding to evolve between them. So much is lost when we over-protect ourselves and over-predict others.

When we eliminate the habits of blaming, withholding and lying from our interactions with others, we begin to become transparent with one another, and ultimately learn more about ourselves. Being vulnerable at this level is a life skill we need to re-learn.

Do your relationship skills need a tune-up? If they do, in addition to relationship coaching, I highly recommend this book: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0609805797/wwwintegratio-20/104-9423782-7950333?creative=327641&camp=14573&adid=07SEGVRZ3M6GK1MMW8Q0&link_code=as1

Although the book title has the word marriage in it, the book’s premise is that all relationships are opportunities for new connections between us.

Most of the concepts outlined in this book outdistance prevalent beliefs about what is true and what is possible in all of our relationships.

Tune up your relationship skills with this enlightening book and if you want to integrate new relationship skills into your life, being coached is the fastest and most direct way. Your world and your relationships will open up and evolve.

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Intimacy ~ A Rumi poem

A mouse and a frog meet every morning on the riverbank.
They sit in a nook of the ground and talk.

Each morning, the second they see each other,
they open easily, telling stories and dreams and secrets,
empty of any fear or suspicious holding back.

To watch, and listen to those two
is to understand how, as it’s written,
sometimes when two beings come together,
Christ becomes visible.

The mouse starts laughing out a story he hasn’t thought of
in five years, and the telling might take five years!
There’s no blocking the speechflow-river-running-
all-carrying momentum that true intimacy is.

Bitterness doesn’t have a chance
with those two.

The God-messenger, Khidr, touches a roasted fish.
It leaps off the grill back into the water.

Friend sits by Friend, and the tablets appear.
They read the mysteries
off each other’s foreheads.

But one day the mouse complains, “There are times
when I want sohbet*, and you’re out in the water,
jumping around where you can’t hear me.

We meet at this appointed time,
but the text says, Lovers pray constantly.

Once a day, once a week, five times an hour,
is not enough. Fish like we are
need the ocean around us!”

Do camel bells say, Let’s meet back here Thursday night?
Ridiculous. They jingle
together continuously,
talking while the camel walks.

Do you pay regular visits to yourself?
Don’t argue or answer rationally.

Let us die,
and dying, reply.

~ Rumi

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Developing a Neutral Mind

 

By Stacy Kamala Waltman

According to many spiritual teachers, events come into our lives in the form of “tests” in order to help us mature and become more balanced. In this light, events are neither good nor bad ~ they are simply occurrences which are structured to help us move past our mental and emotional blocks.

Tests are tailored to the only way we will understand and learn each lesson.  If we pass these “tests” by meeting challenges and then learn to further develop our life skills as a result of the events at hand, then the need for that situation ends and, as a result, the conditions of our lives evolve.

If however, we have not yet learned from the situation, the tests are repeated – under different circumstances – until the necessary understanding has occurred.

By having a “neutral mind” as opposed to a “judgmental mind” that deems dealings as good or bad, we can interpret events as they are, unencumbered by an emotional overlay.

With a “neutral mind” that is neither positive nor negative we have a better chance of moving past the “drama” of a challenging situation. Having this quality or being in this state allows us to move forward to the lesson.

Here is a wonderful old story of a “neutral mind”:

Once upon a time a peasant had a horse. This horse ran away, so the peasant’s neighbors came to console him for his bad luck. He answered, “Maybe”.

The day after, the horse came back and was also leading 6 wild horses. The neighbors came to congratulate him on such good luck. The peasant said, “Maybe”.

The day after this, his son tried to saddle and ride one of the wild horses, but he fell down and broke his leg. Once again the neighbors came to share that misfortune. The peasant said, “Maybe”.

The day after that, soldiers came to enlist the youth of the village, but the peasant’s son was not chosen because of his broken leg. When the neighbors came to congratulate him, the peasant said again, “Maybe”.

Having a neutral mind does not imply being emotionally flat or non-responsive, it is actually representative of a capacity to develop the mental and emotional qualities of sensitivity and discipline.

These qualities allow us to hold a larger vision which is not inclined to make snap judgments. It is a more watchful than judgmental mindset. It is the ability to wait and see how things unfold in a larger context. 

This week, watch for the tendency of your mind to pass judgment. Notice when your mind jumps to conclusions, stereotypes, past episodes, and habitual thinking patterns.

Simply notice these tendencies of your mind without giving in to anger, judgment or frustration with yourself and begin to develop a neutral mind that is open to learning.

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Shake a Leg!

 

Author:  Stacy Kamala Waltman

I met a woman in Rhode Island at a seminar who loved to dance. She loved it so much that even when she talked about dancing, her fact lit up with an infectious smile. She had an energy that made your senses perk up and there was a lilt to her voice that suggested a brewing giggle about to emerge – and we all wanted to be around when it bubbled up. 

She looked as if she was originally from the Caribbean dressing in bright colors: orange, turquoise and red that accentuated bronze skin. She was unique and a hug from her was like getting wrapped in a warm, soft blanket. Oh, and that bodacious smile!  It lit up the room.

She revealed to us that she loves to dance.  In dance all the trials and tribulations in her life are put into perspective and she is better able to manage life’s complexities.  For her, dance is expression, exercise, connection and beauty.

Over the course of our class we learned this vibrant woman is actually depressed. Being deeply religious she is surrounded by people from church who tell her she shouldn’t go out and move her body, gyrating to hypnotic music. These friends say that God really wouldn’t approve of her “sensual” dancing and they believe it is a sin to continue. 

To appease these friends and keep in line with the views of her church, she sometimes limits the amount of time spent on this form of art.

When not dancing, she has more time to become mired in her life; challenges with kids, health, work, and helping others with their life’s issues. But, without the ability to express her passion, the quality of her contributions to these people and “responsibilities” diminishes.  She becomes tired and depleted.

Eventually it is hard to dance at all ~ she’s too exhausted.  It become’s more and more difficult to find her natural rhythm anyway and even the idea of dancing is too much effort.  It’s all for the best, she says; her friends have started talking to her again – now that she isn’t dancing. 

When she spoke to us of these “responsible” times in her life – the times when she put dancing aside and ignored her passion, denied the freedom to feel deeply and express herself fully, her eyes became dull and her vibrancy muted.

If you asked her how she felt when she wasn’t dancing, she answered as if reading from a script. She said it was easier to focus on the more important things now.

Living on opposite sides of the country, I don’t have much occasion to run into this lovely woman and I often wonder how she is and if she has found balance in her life. Her passion, her love, one of the best expressions of herself was through dance and I wonder how she is coping without this freedom. 

I also wonder if she has found friends who are more accepting of her or if she has changed churches. But mostly I wonder if her neighborhood and children continue to be blessed with her smile.  I wonder if she eases someone’s burden just by being her warm and caring self or if she has robbed the world of her gaiety just to fit in. 

When do we stop expressing ourselves and stifle our uniqueness to mold into someone else’s concept of who we should be? How many times do we adapt ourselves to become just like everyone else?  Numbing and dumbing down.  Homogenizing ourselves ~ threatening no one.

Your power lies in your distinctness. Do things differently than they have ever been done before. Step out and shake a leg. Find your eccentricities and revel in them. 

When you see uniqueness in others, celebrate, learn from and enjoy their vibrancy.  Marvel at their courage.  Although they may be expressing their joy and authenticity now does not mean that they have always been supported or understood for their differences. 

Every time you support someone else’s efforts to be authentic especially if it goes against how you think things “should be” you get a little closer to accepting and increasing your own unique traits.

We are here for only a short time. Be an inspiration to others.  Live your life with passion! Dare to be unique and have fun.  Dance ~ Laugh ~ Breath Deeply ~ Express Joy ~ this is your life.  You have the power to bring your self into full view.  Be seen.

May your life be filled with lightheartedness and may you be an inspiration to all!

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Oxygen Mask

 

Author:  Stacy Kamala Waltman

With the proliferation of executive and life coaches and the coaching industry in general, I often wonder when it all started – the concept of coaching.

There sure are a lot of coaches out there.  What criteria should clients use when evaluating a coach’s ability to help them attain the life they want to lead?  Should clients consider hiring only coaches with certification or should they select a coach due to a referral from a friend or colleague?

Just as there are some doctors who are more skilled than others in spite of identical training, so it is with coaches.  A skilled coach is one who cultivates their client’s authenticity and who can ultimately help them expand his or her perspective on life.

In evaluating a coach, consider which one might ask you tough questions in the context of getting past roadblocks.  Which coach is more likely to have an impact on your life and how will you measure that impact?  Ask yourself which coach may be afraid of offending you and therefore may let you slip by because they want you to like them.  With which coach can you be the most transparent and which coach would you likely be trying to impress so you won’t be entirely forthcoming?

Coaches don’t have to lead perfect lives to be highly skilled in this craft, just as some good doctors do not have the healthiest of lifestyles or habits yet they exercise the best of care for their patients.  Great coaches though, do need to be professionals who are comfortable living within ambiguous contexts instead of pigeon holing their clients and they must have the ability to listen well and be able to hear what is not being said.

The best coaches are compassionate yet fierce, adept at seeing larger or different perspectives, insightful and forthright and have a great deal of intuition and compassion.  These skills can’t be taught but they can be honed and developed through training.

An effective coach navigates between stereotypes and helps their clients gain clarity.

I wonder, which airline first announced that in the case of a loss of cabin air pressure passengers should first put on their own oxygen mask before attempting to help their children or other travelers.

Was the policy of “putting on your own oxygen mask first” the first twinkle in the coaching profession’s eye or was it some other seemingly innocuous or serendipitous event that triggered this line of work?

“Putting on your own oxygen mask first” has profound implications for us all.  I don’t know which airline first taught this valuable life skill, but I doubt they realized at the time how profound this instruction was to the quality of our lives and safety on the ground as well as in the air.

“Putting on your own oxygen mask first” is a leadership quality that is developed during the coaching dynamic.  We need to care for ourselves first before we are ready to care for and serve others.

What action do you need to commit to in order to take care of yourself?  Breath deeply, listen for your answer and be allow yourself to be nourished with a commitment to go forward.

 To your unfoldment!

 

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Melting in Chocolate

 

Author:  Stacy Kamala Waltman

A group of us were bathed in chocolate aroma last week as we toured the Scharffen-Berger Chocolate Factory in San Francisco.

Our tour guide was an interesting man who had been with the Scharffen-Berger company for many years and had a lot of provocative stories to tell.  To me, the most interesting tidbit he shared was right before passing around the first of three plates of differing chocolate samples for us to savor.

Our guide encouraged the group to indulge our taste buds and experience how each chocolate bite blossomed into varying flavors.  He reminded us that our stomachs don’t have any taste buds and that by letting each chunk completely melt into our mouth before swallowing we would experience the truest and richest flavors of these tasty morsels.

I was grateful for the reminder.  I might have missed the full intoxicating experience of each chocolate piece because instead of being present, I had been living in the future – rushing the occurrence by wondering how the other chocolate samples on the plate were going to differ from one another and how long it was going to take before he passed the next sample around.

My mind was also observing the entire process:  how the company was marketing its business, our tour guide’s skill at remembering details, how adept he was at delivering jokes, and more.  If left unchecked, my mental chatter might have dulled the full sensory enjoyment of each individual chocolate mound only allowing the first delicious layer of sweetness to register before swallowing so that I could resume my mental analysis.

But with my mental prattle now quieted, I returned to the lesson of chocolate and was amazed to find that the rich thick goo in my mouth actually tasted different the longer it remained on my tongue.  And as the treat oared through my mouth, there were a variety of different flavors that blossomed – just like he said they would.  I am forever in our tour guide’s debt. 

We miss so much by rushing through our lives and allowing our minds to overtake the rest of our being.  Whether it’s a morsel of chocolate or slowing down to enjoy our children, the rewards of life are found in taking the time to experience the richness of each and every moment.

Where can you slow down?  Where can you turn up the quiet?  How will you savor the day?

Enjoy a virtual tour of the Scharffen-Berger Chocolate Factory in San Francisco:  http://www.scharffenberger.com/vtour.asp

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Corpses and Daydreams

By Stacy K. Waltman

If I asked you what you considered to be the most difficult yoga pose, you might answer “Standing on my Head” or “Full Lotus”.

For those of you who have little or no knowledge of yoga, if I asked you what the most difficult thing was to do during your day, you would, more than likely reply, “Getting everything accomplished” or “Finding time to relax”.

It has been said that because we are a highly adaptive species, we assimilate actions that we repeatedly do into our lives, creating habits that re-route our day-to-day activities.

Sometimes we forget what life was like before our new habit took hold. What is “normal” to us shifts and evolves over time.

In this day and age of over-exertion, over-extension, a coffee hut on every corner and over-stimulation by the media, the most difficult thing to do is the exact opposite of how we spend most of our day. Can you guess what the most difficult thing to do is?

We have forgotten how to deeply relax. In the world we have created for ourselves, it takes great effort to resist turning on the TV or to turn it off once it’s on. For those of us who aren’t suffering from insomnia, we remember how to sleep but we have lost the art of how to truly rest.

For many yoga students the most difficult yoga pose in class is Shavasana or the Corpse Pose. Shavasana is the least physically challenging pose in the spectrum of yoga postures because you don’t have to do anything physically. In this position, the mind quiets down; the body sinks into itself and the internal organs have a chance to unwind. Breathing becomes slower and stress tends to evaporate.

The Corpse Pose can be mentally challenging though – the mind wants to, “get on with it” and believes yoga should be an effort because striving is what it knows.

Students who practice Shavasana over time begin to notice and relish the cumulative benefits of this restorative and rejuvenating yoga posture. They find that because their minds are relaxed they tend to make better decisions during their day and spend less time fixing mistakes at work.

According to the Mayo Clinic, if you are experiencing a great deal of stress in your life you need to make time to relax and just a few minutes a day isn’t enough to provide the stress reducing benefits of deep relaxation.

Daydreaming is also a relaxation technique which has many benefits but is different from Shavasana. With daydreaming the mind is relaxed but engaged, whereas with Shavasana the mind is quiet and observing without judging.

Deep relaxation allows for fewer headaches and less body pain. Other benefits include fewer bouts of anger, crying, anxiety, apprehension and frustration.

Additional benefits of deep relaxation include: improved concentration, reduced fatigue, elimination of insomnia, and the lowering of blood pressure.

How often do you daydream? How often do you truly relax? Let your mind rest, your breathing slow, and make time to restore your self.

The Corpse Pose (Shavasana) and daydreams are ways to get your life back into balance. Turn off the TV and marinate in the quiet.

Notice how the quality of your life improves with Shavasana and the peace of deep relaxation. Turn down the noise and turn up the quiet ~

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Telling Lies

 

By Stacy Kamala Waltman

How many lies did you tell yourself yesterday?  The stories, assumptions and interpretations we tend to make up about our unique capacities and limitations.  How many over-generalizations and unconfirmed truths did you ascribe to someone you know?  Here are just a few…

“I’m too old.”

“This won’t work out.”

“Strong women are controlling.”

“I work better under pressure.”

“Men don’t know how to communicate.”

“I can’t sit still long enough to meditate.”

“People who have money are selfish.”

“That’s just the way I am.”

“I can’t lose weight.”

“I can’t save money.”

“I’m not smart enough.”

“Women are needy.”

“Men are untrustworthy”

“I don’t have time.”

“I have a black cloud over my head.”

“I need to get tense in order to get things accomplished.”

“Things should have turned out differently than they did.”

“Who do I think I am to try to attempt that?”

And the list goes on and on. These over-generalizations about ourselves and others expand and many times include adamant opinions about what “those people” are thinking and feeling.

This habit of ours to anticipate and fill in the blanks of our understanding with missing pieces of information that we make up so that we can feel as if we have all the answers, boomerangs back to us as limited understanding.

Our biases, many times having no basis in fact are what we use to define others and ultimately ourselves. 

It is only when we look at our internal and external messages closely that we recognize most of the limiting and critical ideas we hold on to are based upon some type of fear:  fear of change, fear of upsetting the status quo, fear of losing status, fear of the unknown, fear of losing our image, and fear of failure.

These restrictive messages become embedded in our psyche and evolve into what we eventually believe to be true.  Our beliefs then become powerful de-motivators that actually cause us to repel instead of attract success. As a result of this habitual and limited thinking we unwittingly push success away in spite of our best outward efforts.

Our use of these “truths” to explain the behavior of others or hold ourselves back from attempting something new represents powerful, self-limiting beliefs that we create and perpetuate over time. 

These “fictional truths” are habit forming carrying a catatonic vibration and, like a virus, infect every area of our life.  Another result of making over-generalizations about ourselves and other people is that we also weaken our ability to tell the truth to anyone – including ourselves.

Recognizing that their life experiences have been clouded by negativity, many people try to change their lives with often ill-conceived attempts at positive thinking.  This is like throwing a few buckets of water on a raging forest fire.

Other people through the help of a Life Coach or other similar techniques begin to notice their tendencies toward producing limiting thoughts and have learned to re-train themselves to simply notice – without judging themselves as bad or flawed people.

Positive thinking alone won’t help us create and maintain the success we desire.  Positive thinking is however an incredible and powerful tool to be used after we have identified our restrictive core beliefs about ourselves and others.

So… if positive thinking isn’t the way to go, what is?  

Give yourself an opportunity, perhaps today, to isolate a limiting core belief and actively use the tools in this article to carve grooves into the bedrock of that idea. 

Over time, not only will you reduce the hold these ideas have over you but you will ultimately eradicate these entrenched habit patterns altogether.

When you decide to do this and really make a firm decision, it will become easy to accomplish.  The first step is to simply notice.  This small action of becoming aware can produce enormous rewards. 

Keep a journal of the harmful messages you are repeating to yourself and include those times that you make over-generalizations about others.  It is this simple.  This is the art of noticing ~ not judging or ridiculing yourself.  It is the quality of developing your capacity to become aware of your internal dialogue. 

Becoming aware of your thoughts will ultimately illuminate previously hidden tendencies and thought patterns that have been controlling you.  When you begin to notice limiting thoughts, you are exposing them ~ naming them, which is the first step in reversing their power and hold over you.

In yogic philosophy, this technique of noticing and later replacing limiting thoughts is referred to as:  Yoga chitta vritti nirodha.  This Sanskrit phrase written originally by Patanjali in his Yoga Sutras thousands of years ago refers to this process of replacing unwanted thoughts with their opposites.  These sutras provide insight for solving this ancient human challenge.

In our western culture, we call a similar practice: creating affirmations and developing visualization techniques.  In both cases the practice is simple AND it requires dedication to layer the foundation of new thought until it too is built up and becomes bedrock in our mind. 

Decide that you are capable of achieving this goal!

To keep your new thoughts protected and well nurtured, develop an open ear as opposed to a closed mind. 

Become aware of those people, including yourself, who may undermine your efforts with their negative communications or limited thoughts and belief systems.  More than likely, these people don’t mean you harm.  They just don’t have the skills yet to interact with you in any other way.

When you notice a negative person, take a break from them until your new thought system has taken root.  While you can’t take a break from yourself, you can decide to develop the ability to notice your thoughts and actively listen to the words you are speaking. 

Many times limiting thoughts are preceded by the words; ought to, shouldn’t, but, can’t, don’t, better not, always, should, never, or ‘they are this way’.  The words you utter are powerful and they easily take hold in the mind molding perceptions and creating the life you experience.

As a result of becoming aware and monitoring your thoughts, you will discover that this approach gets easier and easier with practice. Over a short amount of time you will become a magnet for success as your new, positive thought forms are firmly established and a new core belief is embedded in your mind. 

Your quality of life will be happier as a result of developing these new skills.

Today, thousands of people interested in self development are practicing the skills of noticing, managing the content of their internal messages and creating a better life for themselves with the help of a Life Coach. 

These people have discovered that almost without exception, their “fictional truths” have not made life easier for them and in fact the opposite has been true. 

When we base our lives on a set of biases, we close many doors and impose erroneous limitations on ourselves, family, employees, employers, neighbors and friends. 

On the other hand, when we begin to notice our habit patterns and look closely at the opinions we have allowed to control us and acknowledge the power we have to change our thoughts and subsequently our lives, we open ourselves to a world of possibilities and potentials.  Doors we presumed were closed or never existed begin to open. 

Our words are powerful.  Make good use of your innate power and create the life of your dreams with these simple tools.

For information about coaching with Stacy Kamala Waltman, please visit, www.integrationcoaching.com

For a greater understanding of Patanjali’s yoga sutras, here is a wonderful resource:  Inside the Yoga Sutras: A Comprehensive Sourcebook for the Study & Practice of Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/0932040578?tag=wwwintegratio-20&camp=14573&creative=327641&linkCode=as1&creativeASIN=0932040578&adid=15FFVFKF6VREFY58VPEA&
 
May Peace, success, abundance and great health be yours!

Blessings!

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“The Secret” ~ Giving and Getting ~ Non-Grasping ~ Non-Hoarding

A colleague of mine and I sent this letter to Abraham Hicks in response to our concern about the recent movie, The Secret.  Also included is the reply we received from their office:

July 14, 2006

Dear Esther,

We have both been profoundly impacted by the work you have done, and the wisdom of Abraham through your tapes and books.  We’ve integrated many of the principles – and, of course still have work to do!

Given our natural affinity for your work, we awaited with anticipation, The Secret on DVD.  We are unhappy to report though that we are very disappointment with many of the messages contained in this film.  We are writing this letter with the intent to communicate our concern regarding this movie, in a respectful and loving way.

From our perspective, the messages in the movie, The Secret, seemed disproportionately slanted toward the attainment of material wealth and we are curious if this was your intention for the movie.

We realize that this may be one way to reach to the mass of people who are not familiar with the Law of Attraction, and yet it saddened us to see such a high percentage of examples on obtaining cars and houses.  Not that there is anything wrong with these examples – however, we feel there were great opportunities to inspire viewers to consider the Law of Attraction not only for material wealth, but also to attract fulfilling work, spiritual growth and development; better relationships; community development; and even peace in the world.  These topics were covered at the end of the movie, but not integrated throughout the film.

We both appreciate and love your contribution to the world’s spiritual development which is evident in all of your books and tapes.  The movie, The Secret though, seems to have missed an opportunity to remind us of the traps in focusing on outward signs of happiness through the attainment of objects instead of developing our internal core.

Thank you for taking the time to read our letter which is sent with love and appreciation for all that you have given to the world.  We hope we are serving the greater good by sending these concerns to you.  We would appreciate hearing back from you.

With respect and gratitude,

Stacy and Andrea

Stacy K. Waltman                               Andrea S
Integration Coaching                            Coach Coaching
President & CEO                                Leadership Development Consultant
www.integrationcoaching.com           
ic@integrationcoaching.com                

Their reply:

Dear Stacy,

The Australian producer of “The Secret” has been inspired by the teachings of Abraham as well as many other remarkable teachers. What was aired in this special was as much a “secret” to Jerry and Esther as it was to everyone else. Jerry and Esther were merely invited to participate and accepted the invitation. It was not produced by Abraham-Hicks Publications, and we are not currently marketing the DVD.

Although Jerry & Esther appreciate many aspects of the finished film, it ended up being quite different from what they had originally contracted to participate in. So when the producer recently insisted on further significant changes in their agreement regarding marketing, distribution, and theatrical rights, Jerry & Esther opted instead to be cut out of the film altogether. This is still in negotiation.

Thank you for your feedback. We will pass it along to Jerry and Esther.

Have a great day,
Jeanne

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