Archive for February, 2007


The book, Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill is an incredible outline of principles that apply to all areas of life – not just the financial arena. 

Originally written in the mid 1950’s this book has the seeds of many modern day thinkers. In fact, according to it’s authors, echoes of Hill’s principles can be found in books by people as diverse as Wally “Famous” Amos, Mary Kay Ash, Ken Blanchard, Chicken Soup for the Soul authors, Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen, Shakti Gawain, John Gray, Tommy Lasorda, Art Linkletter, Joan Lunden, Brian Tracey, Lillian Vernon, Anthony Robbins, Deepok Chopra, Steven Covey and others.

Hill sites a six stage process to obtain your desires:

1) Fix and hold in your mind exactly what you want. The ancient yogi’s call this “singleness of purpose”.  Today’s language uses the word, focus. 

2) Determine exactly what you intend to give so that you are both in a giving and receiving state. The ability to let go of expectations is part of the releasing aspect.  Coaching can help you manage the balance between keeping your thoughts energized and letting go of overly specific results.

3) Establish a definite date when you intend to manifest your desire.

4) Create a definite plan for carrying out your desire and begin at once, whether you are ready or not, to put your plan into action.

5) Write out in a clear, concise statement, your desire, what you intend to give in return and clearly describe the plan through which you intend to acquire your desire.

6) Read your written statement aloud, twice daily. Read it just before retiring at night, and read it once after arising in the morning. As you read; see, feel and believe yourself already in the place you are envisioning.

At a time when the notion of our thoughts holding vibrational power was not popular or believed, Swami Sivanada wrote, “Thought Power” in 1887. This book is steeped in yogic tradition reminding us of ancient teachings that have been in our midst throughout history.

Long before yoga became mainstream, many spiritual masters taught that these teachings which have been passed along throughout generations are “a very old wine packaged in a variety of fresh new bottles”.

This week, be conscious of what you let into your environment. The energies of people, programs, gatherings, objects, etc. affect your vibration. 

If you journal, be conscious of the habit of only writing about what you don’t like or want to experience.  Retrain yourself to write ONLY about what you appreciate and value.  What you focus upon expands in direct proportion to the amount of time you spend on it. 

Your focus is your emotional currency.  Spend your currency on thoughts and feelings that enrich your life instead of those that drain your energy and reinforce a negative mind-set.

If you have set specific goals for yourself, make a concerted effort to only surround yourself with those energies that are in alignment with your aspirations.

Take yourself seriously and surround yourself with people that enhance your sense of well being and are like-minded.

If you would like to learn more about the power of your thoughts, please feel free to contact me at ic@integrationcoaching.com.


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Here is an opportunity to be reminded of how situations in our professional life appear depending upon where we are in relationship to the circumstances. 

The CFO’s tasks include minimizing expenditures, the Marketing Director’s job includes maximizing exposure and impact of the company’s brand and the Human Resource Director’s task includes handling the emotional and legal climate of the company. 

How well these individuals relate to one another and their respective roles in the company will have significant impact on the overall success of the organization. 

How do you manage the appearance of a different point of view?  How do you navigate the emotional waters of conflict in new ways?  Will you benefit from learning a new skill set so that you can expand your current capacity to relate and converse? 

Look at this clip and remember what you already know.  Gaining perspective can shift every area of your life. 


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A friend of mine sent this to me today – Valentine’s Day – and it’s a lovely reminder of how we hold each other in our “mind’s eye”.   

On a trip to Kiniwata Island in the Pacific I had the most extraordinary experience.  The island was outrageously beautiful and I had an enjoyable time, but the thing I remember most about my trip was the fact “Johnny Lingo gave eight cows for his wife.”   I remember Johnny every time I see a man belittle his wife or a wife demean her husband.  When I see either one treat their partner with scorn, I say to them, “You need to know why Johnny Lingo gave eight cows for his wife!” 

Johnny Lingo is known throughout the islands for his skills, intelligence, and savvy. If you hire him as a guide, he will show you the best fishing spots and the best places to get pearls. Johnny is also one of the sharpest traders in the islands. He can get you the best possible deals. The people of Kiniwata all speak highly of Johnny Lingo. Yet, when they speak of him, they always smile just a little mockingly. 

A couple days after my arrival to Kiniwata, I went to the manager of the guesthouse to see who he thought would be a good fishing guide. “Johnny Lingo,” said the manager. “He’s the best around. When you go shopping, let him do the bargaining.  Johnny knows how to make a deal.” 

“Johnny Lingo!” hooted a nearby boy, “Yea, Johnny can make a deal alright!” 

“What’s going on?” I asked, “Everybody tells me to get in touch with Johnny Lingo and then they start laughing.  What’s going on?” 

“Johnny’s the brightest and strongest young man in the islands,” the manager said.  “He’s also the richest for his age.” “But …” I protested. “… if he’s all you say he is, why does everyone laugh at him behind his back?” 

“Well, there is one thing. Five months ago, at the fall festival, Johnny Lingo came to Kiniwata and found himself a wife. He gave her father eight cows!” I knew enough about the local island customs to be impressed. A dowry of two or three cows would net a fair wife and four or five cows would net a very nice wife. 

“Wow!” I said. “Eight cows! She must have beauty that takes your breath away.” “She’s not ugly, …” he conceded with a little smile, “… but calling her ‘plain’ would definitely be a compliment. Sam Karoo, her father, was afraid she would never marry and instead of being stuck with her, he received eight cows for her hand in marriage!  Isn’t that extraordinary? This price has never ever been paid before!” 

The next afternoon I wanted to fish and find the extraordinary pearls the islands were known to cultivate, so I went to the island of Nurabandi.  As I asked for the directions to Johnny’s house, I noticed Johnny’s neighbors were also amused at the mention of his name.  When I met the slim, serious young man I could see immediately why everyone respected his skills. However, this only reinforced my confusion over him.  

As we sat in his house, he asked me, “You come here from Kiniwata?” 

“Yes.”  My curiosity overrode my concern about being polite and I asked, “People there say you exceeded the normal marriage offering of only two cows.  They say you gave eight cows and you grossly overpaid for your wife.” I paused. “They wonder why.” 

“They ask that?” His eyes lighted with pleasure. “Everyone in Kiniwata knows about the eight cows?” I nodded. 

“And in Nurabandi, everyone knows it too?” His chest expanded with satisfaction. “Always and forever, when they speak of marriage settlements, it will be remembered that Johnny Lingo paid eight cows for Sarita.” 

So that’s the answer, I thought: Vanity. 

Just then Sarita entered the room to place flowers on the table. She stood still for a moment to smile at her husband and then left. She was clearly the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. The lift of her shoulders, the tilt of her chin, and the sparkle in her eyes all spelled self-confidence and pride. Not an arrogant and haughty pride, but a confident inner beauty that radiated in her every movement.  I turned back to Johnny and found him looking at me curiously.  

“You find her beautiful?” he murmured. “She … she’s gorgeous.” I said. “Obviously, this is not the one everyone is talking about. She can’t be the Sarita you married on Kiniwata.” 

“There’s only one Sarita. Perhaps, she doesn’t look the way you expected?” 

“She doesn’t. I heard she was homely. They make fun of you because you let yourself be cheated by Sam Karoo.” 

“You think eight cows were too many?” A smile slid over his lips. 

“No, but how can she be so different from the way they described her?” 

Johnny said, “Think about how it must make a girl feel to know her husband paid a very low dowry for her? It must be insulting to her to know he places such little value on her. Think about how she must feel when the other women boast about the high prices their husbands paid for them. I would not let this happen to my Sarita.” 

“So, you paid eight cows just to make your wife happy?” 

“Well, of course I wanted my Sarita to be happy, but there’s more to it than that. You say she is different from what you expected. This is true. Many things can change a woman. There are things that happen on the inside and things that happen on the outside. However, the thing that matters most is how she views herself. In Kiniwata, Sarita believed she was worth nothing. As a result, that’s the value that she projected. Now, she knows she is worth more than any other woman on the islands.  Because she feels valued, she is happy and very good to me.  We have a good and happy life.”

“Then you wanted …”  “I wanted to marry Sarita. She is the only woman I love.” 

“But …” I was close to understanding. “But,” he finished softly, “I wanted an eight-cow wife.” 

Think about your words and actions (both public and private). Do your words and actions make your mate feel s/he is worth eight cows or just one cow?  You are cheating yourself and your partner when you minimize your partner’s value by projecting that they are worth only one cow.  

If you cause damage in this way, your loved one’s will start acting like a one cow person and your life will be miserable.   

As a general rule people respond according to the value you place on them.  Place a higher value on yourself and others by cherishing those that you love.  Your life will be richer and more joyful living this way. 

Happy Valentine’s Day! 

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